不可儿戏

我弹琴并不准确，要弹得准确，谁都会。可是我弹得表情十足。就弹琴而言，我的长处在感情。至于技巧嘛，我用来对付生活。

亚:老兄，我最爱听人家骂我的亲戚了。只有靠这样，我才能忍受他们。五亲六戚都是一群讨厌的人，完全不明白如何生得其道，也根本不领悟如何死得其时。 杰:呸，胡说八道！ 亚:才不呢！

到头来，所有的女人都变得象自己的母亲。那是女人的悲剧。可是没一个男人象自己的母亲。那是男人的悲剧。

亚:老林，希望明天是晴天。 林:明天从来不是晴天，先生。 亚:老林啊，你是个彻底的悲观论者。 林:我尽力而为，求您满意罢了，先生。

The very essence of romance is uncertainty.

If I am occasionally a little over-dressed, I make up for it by being always immensely over-educated.

Jack: Gwendolen, it is a terrible thing for a man to find out suddenly that all his life he has been speaking nothing but the truth. Can you forgive me? Gwendolen: I can. For I feel that you are sure to change. Jack: My own one!

You don’t seem to realise, that in married life three is company and two is none.

Lady Bracknell. Good afternoon, dear Algernon, I hope you are behaving very well. Algernon. I’m feeling very well, Aunt Augusta. Lady Bracknell. That’s not quite the same thing. In fact the two things rarely go together.

You see, if one plays good music, people don’t listen, and if one plays bad music people don’t talk.

Relations are simply a tedious pack of people, who haven’t got the remotest knowledge of how to live, nor the smallest instinct about when to die.

All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That’s his.

But even men of the noblest possible moral character are extremely susceptible to the influence of the physical charms of others.

How absurd to talk of the equality of the sexes! Where questions of self-sacrifice are concerned, men are infinitely beyond us.

They have moments of physical courage of which we women know absolutely nothing.

Never speak disrespectfully of Society, Algernon. Only people who can’t get into it do that.

To speak frankly, I am not in favour of long engagements. They give people the opportunity of finding out each other’s character before marriage, which I think is never advisable.

Upon what grounds may I ask? Algernon is an extremely, I may almost say an ostentatiously, eligible young man. He has nothing, but he looks everything. What more can one desire?

Indeed, no woman should ever be quite accurate about her age. It looks so calculating . . .

每个人犯了错，都美其名为经验

就弹琴而言，我的长处在感情。置于技巧嘛，我用来对付生活。

浪漫的基本精神全在琢磨不定。万一我结了婚，就一定给要忘记自己是结了婚的。

到头来，所有女人都变得像自己的母亲。那是女人的悲剧。可是没一个男人像自己的母亲。那是男人的悲剧。

我最爱听人家骂我的亲戚了。只有靠这样，我才能忍受他们。五亲六戚都是一群讨厌的人，完全不明白如何生得其道，也根本不领悟如何死的其时。

——邻牙利齿，把人给烦死。这年头，个个都是聪明人。无论上哪去，都躲不掉聪明人。这玩意儿已经变成一大公害了。愿上帝保佑，为我们留下几个笨蛋。 ——笨蛋倒也不缺 ——我倒想见见他们。他们都谈些什么呢？ ——笨蛋吗？唉！当然是聪明人喽。 ——真是笨蛋！

应付女人的唯一手段，是跟她谈情说爱，如果她长得漂亮；或者跟别人去谈情说爱，如果她长得平庸。

什么也不敢，倒真是苦差事。不过嘛，只要漫无目的，苦差事我也不在乎。

这年头，子女说的话，做父母的很少肯听了。……我以前对妈的那点影响力，到三岁那年就不灵了。

我喜欢麻烦呀。世界上只有麻烦这种事绝不严重

——花容月貌都是陷阱。 ——这种陷阱每一个懂事的男人都愿意掉进去。